In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
