Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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