I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
well I can't set my house on fire every night
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
Randomize
