But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
