you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
