OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize