real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
She made me pour olive oil on her.
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