If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Randomize