So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
