Fine. I'll sleep in my office
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
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