you guys were way drunker than both of me
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
Randomize
