So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
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