if i died would you start the facebook group?
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Randomize
