so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
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