Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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