We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
