Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
