I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
this will be a night to untag.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
