An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
Randomize
