I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
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