I want to stick my p in your. b.
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize