thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
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