we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
