You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Randomize
