Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
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