i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
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