I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
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