But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
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