he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize
