My hair reeks of homosexuality.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
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