OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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