I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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