Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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