I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Randomize
