If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
