Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Randomize
