How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
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