D3 body, D1 cock
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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