He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
that may or may not have been my penis.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize