I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Randomize
