It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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