i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
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