dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
