It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
I'm passing your future prison.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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