got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
