i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Randomize
