No, you can still breathe under the balls.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Randomize
