Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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