I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
