I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
He passed out mid-signature
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Randomize