now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Randomize