The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
Ketchup is God's man juice
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
