K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
